The dream of riding requires confidence. Confidence to ride a horse is based on three things only.

1. Your ability to ride any sketchy, fast movements (most people don’t have it)

2. Your horse’s ability to never get reactive (most horses don’t have it)

3. Your ability to shut down horses that are becoming reactive (most people can’t read it)

It sounds impossible to keep a dream alive if it all as to be so perfect. good news… It doesn't have to be perfect

Working through each of these three things, one by one, will give us some clues about how to build and maintain our confidence to ride and keep the dream alive. After all, can you remember the dream? You know the one. The dream where you are enjoying your horses instead of feeling like they are a chore. The dream where you love to ride and explore and see the world and experience the majestic movements. That dream? Remember? Don’t you want to keep the dream alive?

Your ability to ride any sketchy, fast movements.

As a trainer, not just of horses, but of people who own horses, I’m always looking for tools that can transform a rider, either by enhancing their confidence or their skills. One skill many riders don’t know about, is the simple act of hugging their horse with their legs. I call it the “security hug.”

When I was riding hot horses, early in my career, I was unfortunately taught, even organically taught, that if I don’t upset an already upset horse by squeezing my legs too tight, I might survive their excited movements. In other words, I was taught to keep my legs off. The truth is, the opposite of “keeping your legs off” is the best method for calming a horse and, more importantly, keeping you connected to the horse, if something sudden does happen.

Most riders tend to keep their legs off because they want to reserve the leg for cues. Many riders keep their legs off because they don’t want to cue the horse to go faster. But the truth is, horses can learn two separate “legs on” signals. One signal means “go.” The other means “I’m feeling I need more security, and I want you to settle and carry me.” Teaching the horse to differentiate between the two signals is simply a matter of practice and intention followed by support and rewards.

By standing in a small arena or riding area, a rider can practice hugging the horse with his or her legs and holding gently on the reins until the horse releases tension instead of building it. The horse will literally stop and relax, at which point you can release and reward. Timing is everything, so start small. In the end, you can be cantering along and squeeze with your legs and the horse feels the hug and begins to slow down and relax. The value is twofold. One, your horse learns to relax, and two, you are literally better prepared for anything. Close contact riding is the key to building confidence in any extreme riding maneuver.

On the flip side, teaching a horse to “go forward” with leg pressure is simple. Just follow your legs cues with loose reins, a kiss or a cluck, and reward the forward movement. In no time at all, your horse will understand one cue means “go” and the other means “relax, my rider is nervous.” Who wouldn’t want their horse to relax when a novice or nervous rider gets on? It’s a huge confidence builder and easy to train.

Your horse’s ability to never get reactive.

This one is not so realistic. Even brave humans get spooked sometimes and react in sudden ways. So rather than take ALL reactivity out, we instead, as trainers, encourage taking reactivity down to a manageable level. In my clinics I teach something called, “spook in place.” Any rider can ride a spook, if the horse just tightens, rather than bolts or bucks. We can literally teach horses to stand their ground, find and stay at home base, be calm, be centered, in spite of the pressure surrounding them.

When you get the chance, (I recommend borrowing a friend to help you for this) ask your horse to stand still, then have your friend do something random behind the horse. Something like throwing a frisbee or opening an umbrella. When your horse startles and moves away, simply bring him back to the original standing point and reward him. Then repeat again and again and again until, eventually, your horse recognizes that moving away didn't get him anywhere and staying his ground gives him rewards. It’s as simple as stimulus, support, rewards, and repetition. Who wouldn’t want a horse that spooks in place rather than jumps out of his skin?

Your ability to shut down horses that are becoming reactive

This ability to shut down your horse, is not something everyone is adept at. Most people miss the building anxiousness in the horse and act far too late. Or they act with too must aggression too soon and actually enhance the anxiousness in the horse. In an ideal world, you could read the horse's body tension cues and mental focus cues and bring them back to earth early. In my book “Leadership and Horses,” I describe the process of bringing a horse’s energy down, or up, to an ideal 5 on a scale of 0-10. Five is a perfect balance of responsive and calm. Ten is vet bill or hospital bill because the reactivity level left the planet. And zero is asleep or dead. Five is the perfect middle.

I encourage people to learn to read their horse by asking for subtle responses. A simple suggestion to stop and back a step will tell you so much information. It will tell you about your horse's mood, tension, focus, energy output, balance, and patience. You have to learn to read the horse and learn to bring the horse either up or down on the scale. It’s all in the book. Check it out. (Leadership and Horses)

Leaving you with a simple tip, I ask my students to think about their horse as having, brakes, steering, and speed control. If their brakes work good, they don’t have any problems. If they suspect the brakes might not work good in certain situations, I encourage them to simulate and practice in those situations, on a smaller scale, until the horse proves to understand them and ultimate proves to be safe in those situations, long before you actually ride in those situations. It’s a bit of common sense, but getting the basics going well, is the primary key to success. After all, a good foundation on a structure provides a long standing, healthy relationship, for all its inhabitants.

All of these tips and tools are designed to help you remember the dream of riding, even enhance that dream, and keep you in that place where you feel safe, your horse feels safe, and you enjoy the thing you spend your time and heart and money on.

Thanks for taking the time to read. I love sharing with you. ​Don